Joining The Cult
Listenin' To The Radio
The Beating Of A High School Bus Driver
Toll Booth Willie
The Lonesome Kicker
The Beating Of A High School Janitor
The Beating Of A High School Science Teacher
The Beating Of A High School Spanish Teacher
The Excited Southerner Proposes To A Woman
Four Years Old
Assistant Principal's Big Day
The Longest Pee
What The Hell Happened To Me?
The Excited Southerner Orders A Meal
by: ADAM SANDLER
[Adam:] And the now the excited southerner orders a meal at his favorite
[Waiter:] Hi, what can I get you today?
[Excited Southerner:] Hi, how are you...I was...if you could, tell me, if you...eh,
the chef salad, if it, does it come, if you come... a la carte, if you see the...I
saw the breakfast menu and the, and they got the, and the different entrees
with the dspe-dspe-dspe-dspecials today, and the the and...I'm watching my
weight...diabetic, with the low sodium...if you could broil...i-i-i-instead
of fried, I ya, just, hash browns...I wanted to mix the ketchup with the
may-mayonaise, make my own sauce, if that's, could bring out a separate
plate for that with the chicken, your chicken fried steak...the blue plate
special, does that come with the soup of the day, or-
[Waiter:] I'll come back when you're ready.
[Excited Southerner:] Hoooo...
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