WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Like A Surgeon
I finally made it through med school
Somehow I made it through
I'm just an intern
I still make a mistake or two
I was last in my class
Barely passsed at the institute
Now I'm trying to avoid, yah I'm trying to avoid
A malpractise suit
Hey, like a surgeon
Cuttin' for the very first time
Like a surgeon
Organ transplants are my line
Better give me all your gause nurse
This patient's fading fast
Complicatio
Don't know how long he'll last
Let me see, that I.V.
Here we go - time to operate
I'll pull his indsides out, pull his insides out
And see what he ate
Like a surgeon, hey
Cuttin' for the very first time
Like a surgeon
Here's a waiver for you to sign
Woe, woe, woe
It's a fact - I'm a quack
The disgrace of the A.M.A.
'Cause my patients die, yah my patients die
Before they can pay
Like a surgeon, hey
Cuttin' for the very first time
Like a surgeon
Got your kidneys on my mind
Like a surgeon, ooh like a surgeon
When I reach inside
With my scalpel, and my forceps, and retractors
Oh oh, oh oh, woe, oh
Ooh baby, yah
I can hear your heartbeat
For the very last time
More
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WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Harvey The Wonder Hamster
<br />Oh, Harvey, Harvey<br />Harvey the Wonder Hamster<br />He doesn't bite and he doesn't squeal<br />He just runs around on his hamster wheel<br />Harvey, Harvey<br />Harvey the Wonder Hamster<br />Hey, Harvey!<br /><br /> ... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Headline News
<br />Once, there was this kid who<br />Took a trip to Singapore and brought along his spray paint<br />And when he finally came back<br />He had cane marks all over his bottom<br />He said that it was from when<br />The warden whacked i... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Hit Me With A Rock
<br />When I was a little boy<br />(When I was just a boy)<br />And my mother would call my name<br />(When I was just a boy)<br />She'd say I had to be in the house by seven<br />(When I was just a boy) <br /><br />But I'd stay out late... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Holiday Greetings 1987
<br />Hi, this is "Weird Al" Yankovic, and I'd just like to take this opportunity to say:<br />Merry Christmas<br />Merry Christmas<br />Merry Christmas<br /><br />Hello, this is "Weird Al" Yankovic, <br />hoping that your new year isn't... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Holiday Greetings 1988
<br />Hi, this is "Weird Al" Yankovic. <br />Remember, if you have one or two of those traditional blueberry daiquiris <br />this holiday season, please, let somebody else drive<br /><br />Hello, this is "Weird Al" Yankovic, <br />urging... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - I Can't Watch This
<br />I can't watch this. I can't watch this<br />I can't watch this. I can't watch this<br /><br />My my my my TV makes me so bored<br />Makes me say, oh my lord<br />What is this garbage here?<br />Wanna cover my eyes and plug my ears<... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - I Love Rocky Road
<br />I hear those ice cream bells and I start to drool<br />Keep a couple quarts in my locker at school<br />Yah, but chocolate's gettin' old<br />Vanilla just leaves me cold<br /><br />There's just one flavor good enough for me, yah me... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - I Remember Larry
<br />Say, do you remember that guy Larry next door<br />Well, he always was the neighborhood clown<br />Like the time he took my pants off and he took those color pictures<br />And posted copies all over town<br />Or the time that he du... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - I Think I'm A Clone Now
<br />Isn't it strange<br />Feels like I'm lookin' in the mirror<br />What would people say<br />If only they knew that I was<br /><br />Part of some geneticist's plan (plan-plan-plan)<br />Born to be a carbon copy man (man-man-man)<br /... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - I Want A New Duck
<br />Woh oh<br /><br />I want a new duck<br />One that won't try to bite<br />One that won't chew a hole in my socks<br />One that won't quack all night<br /><br />I want a new duck<br />One with big webbed feet<br />One that knows how ... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - I Was Only Kidding
<br />When I said that I'd be faithful<br />When I promised I'd be true<br />When I swore that I could never<br />Be with anyone but you<br />When I told you that I loved you<br />With those tender words I spoke<br />I was only kidding<b... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - I'll Repair For You ( A Theme For Home Improvement )
<br />So you got dry rot and your water pressure's weak<br />Your trash compactor's broke, the roof has sprung a leak<br />You just found out your toilet's overflowed<br />And your smoke detector's smoking and your heater's gonna explode... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - I'm So Sick Of You
<br />You tell a joke and forget the punchline<br />Why you always wastin' my time?<br />Hey baby, trust me, you just disgust me<br />You hair's a mess and your make-up's crusty<br />I don't know too many females<br />Who make a habit of... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - If I Could Make Love To A Bottle
<br />If I could make love to a bottle<br />The first thing that I'd like to do<br />I'd search the world over to find one<br />that had the exact same circumference as you<br /><br /> ... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Isle Thing
<br />Met this fine young thing<br />At the local Circle K<br />We made a date for a half past eight<br />And I said, "What the hey?"<br /><br />So I journeyed to her crib<br />And I let myself inside<br />That chick was slouched down on... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - It's All About The Pentiums
<br />It's all about the Pentiums, baby<br />Uhh, uh-huh, yeah<br />Uhh, uh-huh, yeah<br />It's all about the Pentiums, baby<br />It's all about the Pentiums, baby<br />It's all about the Pentiums! (It's all about the Pentiums, baby)<br ... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - It's Still Billy Joel To Me
<br />What's the matter with the songs he's singin'<br />Can't you tell that they're pretty lame<br />After listenin' to a couple albums<br />Well, they all start to sound the same<br /><br />So he tried to change his musical style<br />... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Jerry Springer
<br />It's been one week since we got to see<br />Cheatin' lovers and cousins that marry<br />Five days since they had the show<br />With the hermaphrodite, the slut, and the crack ho<br />Three days since we heard the tale<br />About th... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Jurassic Park
<br />I recall the time they found those fossilized mosquitoes<br />And before long, they were cloning DNA<br />Now I'm being chased by some irate veloceraptors<br />Well, believe me... this has been one lousy day<br /><br />Jurassic Par... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Kidstar 1250 Radio Promotion
<br /><i>[telephone dialing]</i><br /><br />Just eat it, eat it<br />Get yourself an egg and beat it<br />Oh, eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it<br /><br />Hi<br />This is Al<br />But you can call me "Weird", as is "Weird Al"<br />"Weird Al"... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Lasagna
<br />La-la-la-la-lasagna<br />You want-a some-a lasagna magnifico<br />Or a-maybe spaghetti<br />Ay, you supper's a-ready now, where you go<br />Mama mia bambino<br />Mama mia bambino, 'samatta you<br />'Samatta you, 'samatta you<br /><... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Laundry Day
<br />You gotta keep 'em separated<br /><br />You like the latest fashions<br />You'd like to keep 'em clean<br />You take a trip every week to the laundromat<br />Throw a load in the washing machine<br /><br />But if you don't wanna rui... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Leisure Suit Serenade
<br />Wearin' old T-shirts and grubby jeans<br />People say I look kinda odd<br />Well, I'm never accepted in the social set<br />'Cause they say that I'm a clod<br /><br />But once in a while, I go to my closet<br />And I put on somethi... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Let Me Be Your Hog
<br />Let me be your hog<br />Let me be your hog, now (snort, snort)<br />I said baby baby baby baby baby<br />Baby baby baby baby baby baby<br /><br /> ... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Like A Surgeon
<br />I finally made it through med school<br />Somehow I made it through<br />I'm just an intern<br />I still make a mistake or two<br /><br />I was last in my class<br />Barely passsed at the institute<br />Now I'm trying to avoid, yah... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Livin' In The Fridge
<br />There's something weird in the fridge today<br />I don't know what it is<br />Food I can't recognize<br />My roommate won't throw a thing away<br />I guess it's probably his<br />It looks like it's alive...<br /><br />And livin' in... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Matter Of Crust
<br />Some bread, you can get bargain-priced<br />And every loaf you buy begins with a singular slice<br />But you know it will go stale again<br />Always does, its just a question of when<br /><br />I've lived long enough to have learne... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Melanie
<br />Me-he-he-helanie<br />What can the problem be<br />Sweet Me-he-he-he-helanie<br />Why won't you go out with me<br /><br />She lived across the street on the fifteenth floor of the Gilmore building<br />I saw her in the shower reach... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Money For Nothing/Beverly Hillbillies
<br />Beverly<br /><br />Beverly Hillbillies<br /><br />Huh, now lookie here people<br />Listen to my story<br />A little story 'bout a man named Jed<br />You know something?<br />That poor mountaineer<br />They say he barely kept his fa... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Mr. Frump In The Iron Lung
<br />I visit Mr. Frump in the hospital<br />I see him most every day<br />And when I see Mr. Frump in his iron lung<br />This is what I hear him say<br /><br /><i>[deep breathing]</i><br /><br />Y'know, Mr. Frump is my very best friend<... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - My Baby's In Love With Eddie Vedder
<br />Oh, my baby, my baby she don't want me no more<br />Ever since she saw his poster in that record store<br />She says the way he grinds his molars is really sexy<br />She thinks he's so darn dysfunctional and "Generation X"y<br />Sh... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - My Bologna
<br />Ooh, my little hungry one, hungry one<br />Open up a package of my bologna<br />Ooh, I think the toast is done, the toast is done<br />Top it with a little of my bologna<br /><br />Never gonna stop, eat it up<br />Such a tasty snac... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Never Met A Person As Wonderful As Me
<br />Well, I stare at myself in the mirror<br />When I wake up every morn<br />And I marvel at how great I've been<br />Since the day that I was born<br /><br />I've made so many albums<br />I've run out of things to name 'em<br />My fa... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Nobody Here But Us Frogs
<br />Oh, I've really got those ozone layer blues<br />From my elbow down to my shoes<br />So let's throw another fire on the logs<br /><br />Now we can go downtown and fill the latrine<br />With genuine Columbian lima beans<br />Dynasti... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Ode To A Superhero
<br />Peter Parker was pitiful<br />Couldn't have been any shyer<br />Mary Jane still wouldn't notice him<br />Even if his hair was on fire<br /><br />But then one day he went to that science lab<br />That mutated spider came down<br />O... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Pacman
<br />(one, two, thray, four)<br />(one, two <i>[nasal hocking sound]</i>)<br /><br />I used to be a pinball freak<br />That's where you'd find me every week<br />But now it's Pacman<br />Yeah it's the Pacman<br /><br />I love to gobble ... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Party At The Leper Colony
<br />Finger food and an ice cold keg<br />It won't cost you an arm and a leg<br />Dance all night to a rotten band<br />Come on, people, let's give 'em a hand<br /><br />Saturday night, it's the place to be<br />Everybody cut footloose ... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Phony Calls
<br />Mom and dad are goin' out for the evening<br />And you're stuck inside the house all alone<br />That's when you decide it might be fun to harrass someone<br />Dial a random number up on your telephone<br />You ask if their refriger... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Polka Patterns
<br />Everywhere, I see them there<br />I stop and stare at patterns<br />I don't care, I must declare<br />I've got a flair for patterns<br /><br />On my hair, the clothes I wear<br />My savoir faire is patterns<br />All I see is patter... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Polka Power!
<br />Yeah, I'll tell ya what I want, what I really really want<br />So tell us what you want, what you really really want<br />I'll tell ya what I want, what I really really want<br />So tell us what you want, what you really really wan... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Polka Your Eyes Out
<br />Rock the cradle of love. Rock the cradle of love<br />Yes, the cradle of love<br />Don't rock easy, it's true<br />Rock the cradle of love<br />I rocked the cradle of love<br />Yes, the cradle of love<br />Don't rock easy, it's tru... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Polkamon
<br />Krabby, Snubbull, Venonat<br />Mankey, Chansey and Zubat<br />Slowking, Ditto, Butterfree<br />Lugia and Caterpie<br />Oddish, Poliwag, Goldeen<br />Elekid and Nidoqueen<br />Victreebel and Magneton - Everybody Polkamon!<br /><br /... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Pretty Fly For A Rabbi
<br />Veren zol fun dir a blintsa<br /><br />(How ya doin' Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey<br />(How ya doin' Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey<br />(How ya doin' Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey<br />And all the goyim say I'm pretty fly for a rabbi<br /><br />Mec... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - RealRadio 104.1
<br /><i>[with polka music in the background]</i><br /><br />Hi<br />This is "weird Al" Yankovic fresh off my Alapalooza World Tour<br />When I'm not busy signing autographs<br />Fighting off mobs of beautiful women<br />Making gold albu... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - Ricky
<br /><i>[R:]</i> Hey Lucy, I'm home<br /><br /><i>[L:]</i> Oh Ricky, you're so fine<br /><i>[L:]</i> You're so fine you blow my mind<br /><i>[L:]</i> Hey Ricky, hey Ricky<br /><br /><i>[R:]</i> Oh Lucy, you're so fine<br /><i>[R:]</i> Y... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - School Cafeteria - Version 1
<br />Is it on? Okay<br />1, 2, 1, 2, 5, 6<br />Let me tell you 'bout the school cafeteria<br />It's got all the others beat<br />It sells over four million burgers a year<br />Just think, that's almost two pounds of meat<br /><br />My i... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - School Cafeteria - Version 2
<br />Now, let me tell you 'bout the school cafeteria<br />It's got all the others beat<br />It sells over four million burgers a year<br />Just think, that's almost two pounds of meat<br /><br />My ice cream sandwich is lukewarm<br />Bu... WEIRD AL YANKOVIC - She Drives Like Crazy
<br />Where'd you learn how to steer<br />You do eighty in second gear<br />When you drive, I can't relax<br />Got your license from Cracker Jacks<br />You just hit another tree<br />These fender benders are killin' me<br /><br />She dri...